Meditation 1

day 1
thought webs
the importance of focus
You can't stop the birds from flying back and forth over your head, but you can stop them from nesting in your hair. - S. Francis

Today you are going to try one of the simplest forms of meditation there is. In the meditation you won't be attempting to go beyond your thoughts, fight against them, or experience anything in particular, but instead you will simply try to get a feel for letting them come and go without attachment. We are not our thoughts.
Our thoughts are only products of our mind. They pull at us and enchant us incessantly, trapping us in a mental word web. We feel as if we are one with them, as if we are our thoughts. Today, quite simply, you are going to question this belief.
Beyond all our thoughts but still within our minds, there is a quiet place, much as a busy city might have a tranquil park within its boundaries. To those living in the rush of city life, such a park may go unnoticed as they speed right past it without so much as a sideward glance. The busy inhabitants have no time to stop and explore. But for those who do, great rewards await.
Once today set aside about five minutes of your time to rest your body and mind. Don't expect too much. Don't even try to understand the purpose behind the exercise. You need not feel stress over anything in this practice. Don't worry about whether or not you are doing the exercise correctly. Just relax and do your best to apply the following:

1. Sit down, make yourself comfortable, and close your eyes.
2. Take several deep, relaxing breaths. Feel the air fill your lungs from the bottom up, holding it for a few seconds before you exhale in one long, extended stream.
3. Relax your body. Take a few moments to get a sense of relaxation in your muscles, letting all the tension drop away as if it were flooding out of you and into the air. Relax your neck and shoulders, your arms and hands, your chest, stomach, and back, and finally your thighs, calves, and feet.
4. Now think to yourself, "I think, but I am not my thoughts." This is your focus sentence. Use it as a focus for your meditation, repeating as often as needed to keep your mind focused on these words instead of the chatter.
5. Between repetitions of the focus sentence, try, as best you can, to observe your thoughts without interacting with them. For instance, if a thought about work occurs to you, you might be tempted to dwell on it or to follow its course to another related thought such as plans for the weekend, when you don't have to work. Instead, when you notice that you are engaging with a thought, stop, note the thought, and then return your attention to the focus sentence. Sometimes you will be successful and sometimes not; in either case another thought will follow. Just continue the process with each new thought.
6. Whenever you realize that you've forgotten about your meditation and have let your mind engage with a thought -- which is likely to be much more often than not -- interrupt your train of thought by repeating your focus sentence, more than once if need be. Think it clearly in your mind, focus on it, and then return to the attempt to let your thoughts drift by passively.Be calm and gentle but also very firm with yourself on this point. Continually redirecting your focus to the meditation -- letting thoughts rise and disappear -- is the whole point of today's exercise. The function of the focus sentence is just to remind you of your meditation. The function of the focus sentence is just to remind you of your meditation.

Parenting Mindfully 5

Parenting Mindfully 5

As a mother of young children Chittaprabha, from the Western Buddhist Order, was a committed meditator, rising early in the morning and, when her children were older, attending weekend or week-long retreats. She insists that she was able to be a far better mother by taking this time.

Meditation is a way not only to attend to my own needs but to develop an awareness of others so that I can participate in all that I do in a more positive and creative way. Becoming more aware of the broader meaning of my life and of my true nature leads to a deeper sense of joy, contentment and equanimity from which everyone around me benefits.

The aim is to take the awareness that we develop through meditation and allow it to permeate our whole life. As a mother such awareness helped me to see how I interacted with my children and the effects of my actions. So instead of repeating mistakes in an old habitual manner I could use awareness to bring about positive change and let go of a fixed and unchanging way of parenting.

Being a parent can be a very important and enriching aspect of our lives, but our lives go beyond this. If I devoted all my attention to my children’s desires, I would only be focussed on my immediate world and I’d be giving up the opportunity to become a true individual. When I embraced the wider perspective available through meditation I became more creative, free and responsive to the whole of life around me and less grasping and attached to my children and the things that brought me pleasure.

The pleasure of loving and interacting spontaneously with children lessened if I tried to hold on too tightly. So I’ve always tried to seek a range of wholesome sourses of pleasure, at the same time avoiding any grasping attachment to those pleasures.

Her two daughters, Michelle and Cara, laugh as they remember telling their mother at times throughout their childhood, ‘Mum, I think it’s time for you to go on another retreat.’ Amusingly, many Buddhist parents report that it’s often their children who remind them to take some time to meditate.

Chittaprabha also makes the point that to raise responsible, considerate children we need to teach them awareness and respect for the needs of others, including those of their parents. Although this is trickier when our children are young and egocentric, eventually they need to understand our need for some space to ourselves.

Chittaprabha urges all mothers to find some time every day, even if it’s one minute, to reflect on something higher than themselves and their immediate lives:

We make some time in each day where we can aspire to be our greatest selves. It might be a time to read and reflect on a short verse. We might light some candles or incense to offer to the Buddha. Or we meditate. And if we are not making this time we could ask ourselves what will inspire us to do so? For some it might be nature. Or it could be reading? Talking to our spiritual friends? Involvement in a spiritual community?

It’s worth remembering that in developing mindfulness, we might gain more time in our day. As we’ve discussed, with a more focussed and clear mind we use our time more effectively, and find more energy. Many meditators claim they can survive on less sleep, the deep levels of concentration they attain in meditation providing a higher quality of rest. (excerpt from Buddhism for Mother)

.

retreat: khóa ẩn tu.
positive: tích cực.
equanimity: bình thản.
contentment: vừa lòng.
permeate: thấm nhuần.
interacted: đối xử với nhau.
perspective: cách nhìn, viễn cảnh.
attached: chấp thủ (thuật ngữ)
trickier: rắc rối hơn, khó khăn hơn.
egocentric: vị kỷ.
verse: khổ thơ.

Parenting Mindfully 4

Giac Ngo English Club - Parenting Mindfully 4
Research & Production: 2007.Jul.14.Sun.11h45-18h36Author: AD Marshall Presentation: 2007.Jul.21.Sun.15h00-15h45

The purposes of this session of Parenting Mindfully are to review the vocabulary covered in earlier sessions in a new context of mindful parenting and add some more to your vocabulary.
To this end, the Giac Ngo E-Club's Assistant Andi Marshall has written the discussion below using all of the vocabulary you previously learned, in the order that you learned it. See the earlier sessions presented on this blog, below, the those sessions and their vocabulary lists.
Note: Andi wants to point out, before you read, that he is not a Buddhist scholar or teacher and you should decide for yourself whether the opinions expressed below are reasonable or not. The primary purpose of the following discussion is to exercise your vocabulary, not to provide a well-researched, scholarly text.

To parent mindfully one should carefully use childcare to anticipate children's need to notice that welcoming hugs can come from those besides their parents and immediate family -- even from cats, dogs, cockroaches, full-grown tigers and various viruses they are sure to meet -- thus helping each child learn to positively engage all the new things and changes they will forever meet, both within and outside themselves, over every moment of their lives.

Of course, Engaged Buddhist parents should also not forget to tell and show their children that welcoming hugs can be also be hurtful, like that of the spider embracing a fly and that sometimes one must also embrace those who are irritable or lethargic, including one's self, instead of only welcoming those things they feel are exquisite, hilarious or comforting.

The Engaged Buddhist parent should know or learn themselves the sheer, extraordinary miracle of affording a welcoming embrace to every moment, mood and thing they meet in their lives. If they do not, their children will notice and follow their actions, not their lessons or words.
Practicing Buddhism is to mentally strive on a spiritual journey. It is constantly, rigorously fantacizing and engaging whatever is exciting and stimulating in everything one meets, instead of submitting to the pressures from one's society or economy apparently requiring one to become a repetitive zombie. It is yanking one's self consciously back into an awareness of the exquisite or hilarious aspects of every thing, even things that at first seem bad, until that awareness becomes almost always automatic.

In every society, ripening children will be mercilessly expected to meet the standards and expectations of whoever happens to be in power. Mindful parents will support their children with compassion for their struggles and fears about meeting such expectations and not berate or recriminate them when they cannot. Mindful parents strive to never be unhelpful and instead encourage their children to forge ahead, even unnoticed -- maybe even better unnoticed -- approaching everything they meet as a positive engagement. They are gentle, patient and persistent in teaching their children to memorize this approach to life, not only with their minds but with their bodies as well, for this is the ultimate lesson of self-sufficiency.

Finally, Engaged Buddhist parents must also always remember that children raised by people who enjoy what Christians call "sinning" have almost always ended up as teenagers who are on sight noticed more for their flaws than for their either knowing or being able to offer acceptance of others, for what each of us is, from a positive perspective. These are flaws that, themselves, almost always lead to more suffering than even that that one must expect from being an almost limitless being caged within a limited body that will forever want or need more than food, clothing or shelter until it dies and releases the being it houses.

English-Vietnamese Glossary
New
carefully: phó từ, cẩn thận, chu đáo
cockroaches: danh từ, (động vật học) con gián
various: tính từ, khác nhau; nhiều thứ khác nhau
virus: danh từ, (y học) virut
positively: phó từ, xác thực, rõ ràng; quả quyết, khẳng định, chắc chắn; tích cực; tuyệt đối
moment: danh từ, chốc, lúc, lát
hurtful: tính từ, có hại, gây tổn hại, gây tổn thương
embrace: danh từ, sự ôm, cái ôm, (nói trại) sự ăn nằm với nhau; ngoại động từ, ôm, ôm chặt, ghì chặt, nắm lấy (thời cơ...); đi theo (đường lối, đảng phái, sự nghiệp...); gồm, bao gồm; bao quát (nhìn, nắm)
self: danh từ, bản thân mình, cái tôi
mood: danh từ, tâm trạng; tính khí, tâm tính, tính tình
submit: nội động từ, chịu, cam chịu, quy phục
pressure: danh từ, sức ép, áp lực ((nghĩa đen) & (nghĩa bóng)), áp suất
society: danh từ, xã hội
economy: danh từ, sự quản lý kinh tế; nền kinh tế; tổ chức kinh tế
apparently: phó từ, nhìn bên ngoài, hình như
aspect: danh từ, khía cạnh; mặt
struggle: danh từ, sự đấu tranh; cuộc đấu tranh, cuộc chiến đấu
encourage: ngoại động từ, làm can đảm, làm mạnh dạn; khuyến khích, cổ vũ, động viên; giúp đỡ, ủng hộ
ultimate: tính từ, cuối cùng, sau cùng, chót
perspective: danh từ, luật xa gần; phối cảnh; tranh vẽ luật xa gần; hình phối cảnh; cảnh trông xa; (nghĩa bóng) viễn cảnh, triển vọng; tương lai, tiến độ
suffering: danh từ, sự đau đớn, sự đau khổ
limitless: tính từ, vô hạn
limited: tính từ, có hạn, hạn chế, hạn định
being: danh từ, sinh vật; con người; sự tồn tại; sự sống; bản chất; thể chất
shelter: danh từ, chỗ che, chỗ nương tựa, chỗ ẩn, chỗ núp, hầm; lầu, chòi; phòng, cabin (người lái)
houses: ngoại động từ, đón tiếp (ai) ở nhà; cho ở, cho trọ, chưa (ai...) trong nhà; cất vào kho; lùa (súc vật) vào chuồng

03-ParentingMindfully 3

Gentle, patient and persistent

ripe: đến lúc, hợp thời.
mercilessly: không thương tiếc.
standards: chuẩn mực.
expectations: kỳ vọng.
support: ủng hộ, nâng đở.
compassion: đồng cảm, (thuật ngữ) lòng từ.
berate: nhiếc mắng.
recrimination: đổ lỗi.
unhelpful: vô dụng.
forge ahead: diễn tiến, đi đến.
unnoticed: không bị để ý.
approach: tiếp cận, ứng đối.
gentle: nhẹ nhàng.
patient: nhẫn nại.
persistent: kiên trì.
memorise: ghi nhớ.
self-sufficiency: tự đầy đủ, (thuật ngữ) tự tại.
Raised: được nuôi dưỡng.
sinning: phạm tội.
ended up: kết thúc.
teenager: thiếu thời.
on sight: ngay khi thấy.
flaws: khuyết điểm.
acceptance: chấp nhận.

02-ParentingMindfully 2

What do Buddhist mothers say?

One significant effect that practising Buddhism can have on our life is that we might actually be there for it. As our life unfolds, rather than being mentally elsewhere, as we usually are, we strive to be present in the here and now... Anne, the mother of two young daughters:

Buddhism helps me to see motherhood as a spiritual journey. At the worst of times, I can remind myself that parenting is practice and practice of the most rigorous kind. My children are my teachers repeatedly forcing me to live in the present moment and give up fantasising about all the exciting and stimulating things I could be doing.

As a mother you constantly need to ask the questions: ‘What does this moment require?’ and ‘What is important here?’On bad days I notice my daughters automatically repeating themselves as though they know I’am a distant zombie who’s not quite there with them. When this happens I know to yank myself back into the present and give them close attention. Following Buddhist teachings I’m likely to parent consciously and with awareness of what the present moment requires rather than allowing my children to become the victims of my automatic reactions.

Notes: The following words is rather considered to be meaningful than new.

practising Buddhism: (thuật ngữ) tu tập theo Phật giáo
mentally: (thuật ngữ) về phương diện tâm thức.
strive: nổ lực
spiritual journey: (thuật ngữ) con đường tâm linh
rigorous: tinh tấn.
fantasising: mộng tưởng, (thuật ngữ) vọng tưởng.
exciting: kích thích.
stimulating: làm cho bị khích động.
constantly: một cách thường xuyên.
require: yêu cầu.
repeating: lập lại một hành vi hay một lời nói.
zombie: ‘người vô hồn’, somebody unresponsive or unthinking: somebody who lacks energy, enthusiasm, or the ability to think independently (informal)
yank: giật phắt lại/đi.
consciously: tỉnh giác, (thuật ngữ) chú tâm cảnh giác.
awareness: ý thức, (thuật ngữ) chánh niệm tỉnh giác.
automatic: tự động, (thuật ngữ) thất niệm.